You are truly your own worst enemy. Convincing oneself of anything else seems impossible.
This past week has been one of many mood swings and mood killers. RV just rolls his eyes when I make up an impossible argument, twisting words to mean what I am convinced they are to mean when it really isn’t anything close.
I’m vague because I can’t even pinpoint what it is. I’m hoping this feeling passes because it’s somewhat self-destructive. My behavior. My actions.
He asks me to communicate. I respond in silence or something completely unrelated. He’s right though. If I don’t talk to him or to anyone else, it won’t ever work itself out.
As a distraction, I asked for new crochet hooks and some fuzzy yarn. I’m working on a rather simple scarf for RV, hoping that creating something will take my mind off the destruction of something else.
[Related]
- Thought for the New Year Dear Friends, For a number of reasons which...
9 Responses to “Self-destruct in 5…4…”
Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.
All of this is true but you have to work stuff out in your own time. Can I be next on the list for a scarf?
I'm here to talk if you need it too! I keep trying to get other people to communicate a little more, but they don't like to talk because sometimes it's a little rougher to talk about something than to avoid it. At least he's patient about it. You've got a good catch there!
Although what if…talking to yourself…journaling as we probably did way way way back in the day is a way to figure it out or at least make it the release valve? But I am sure it has passed for now. :) And you return to being Happy!
I hope you will feel better soon. My week's been a storm similar to yours. The good thing is that you're aware of your actions and how destructive they can be. Let the zoning out while crochet help clear your mind.
Yeah, I'm very lucky in that I'm pretty self-aware. I can control things to a certain extent. Thanks for always commenting on here. :) Makes me feel like I'm not just writing into space.
Communication varies for different personality types. You just have to figure out what angle to go at without being overcritical or seem to be attacking the person in question.
Very lucky to have RV around. He and I are a funny pair.
Yeah, I will work on it as soon as I can get myself to stop unraveling the one I'm currently working on…
Doing something creative is a good way to control those destructive feelings. You may also want to engage into any sports that you can do solo.
I usually run 5k if I'm pissed, just make sure your mind and eyes are on the road.
Cheer up always and stay positive!
happy thanksgiving! :D
I'm sure all the little things on your mind have just been piling up. Give yourself a break every now and again :) Stuff your face and take some shots.